September 28, 2011

heart:bootcamp

Ever have a day where you feel like everyone is coming down on you? I have for almost two weeks straight now. It felt like everytime I encountered someone they were looking to argue, make a point, or just have an attitude. I’m not saying this at all for sympathy, trust me, it's just fact. What’s almost funny about that, is for years I had the worst attitude ever. I was snappy, saying whatever came to mind without thought for how it would make someone feel, and never backed down from an argument. That is something I gave to God awhile ago and I believe He is continuing to work it totally out of me. Not only just not to say anything back or just leave the sitation alone BUT to not even be moved in my deepest of hearts to feel like saying something snappy back AND to use that time to love on them instead.

After the first few times of being in a situations where I was like "ummm where did that just come from?" I started asking God what the heck was going on. I wasn’t in victim mode of “why is everyone being mean ” it was more like… is there something still inside that you want me to see and is this how you’re doing it? Am I doing something to invite this that I need to be aware of? For almost two weeks I didn’t feel like God was saying anything to me about it, so I just kept trying to handle each situation with at least not getting into a negative exchange.

Yesterday though this lady was on a whole other level and while I didn’t say anything rude or argue, I walked away totally pissed and vented to Kevin. While we were in the car later I was thinking about it and God put it on my spirit that “as long as I was still moved at all by situations like this, they were going to keep happening because He has to prepare my heart, and this was just heart bootcamp.” Can you imagine the mental image that accompanied this? Yup… hearts climbing over walls and swinging off ropes into muddy pools of water...my imagination is still that of a child, can you tell?

But once I really started thinking about it, I realized that when God puts a call on your life He has to make sure you are equipped. He has called me to literally spread His love. Spreading His love to his people. People are not always easy to love at times and He wants to make sure my heart can go beyond my own personal defenses or reactions and continue to love especially when it’s hard. I also got understanding that when the enemy is scared of you he will do anything to change your heart and distract you from your purpose. I say this to put a giant spotlight on one of his oldest tricks in his book of whackness. It would only make sense right? If God wants me to love people wouldn’t the enemy want me to resent them or not want to be bothered? Wouldn’t he do whatever he could to change my heart towards people? Not going to work buddy.

If you’re aware of his tricks you can step on his head and keep walking down the path God has for you. I share this because I also don’t want any of you who have been doing GiveLove or whatever you have been trying to do better with in your own life...to feel discouraged if you encounter situations like this along the way. Stay encouraged and  BEING love.

30 comments:

  1. love this outfit girl! i didn't know their were linkups for what i wore posts. i'm trying this out :)

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  2. so true...I love your mental image of the heart climbing over a wall & swinging off ropes :) I used to be that way when people would be completely rude at work but then one day I decided it wasn't going to ruin my day...it hasn't in such a long time :)

    erica
    seaofbloomingdreams.blogspot.com

    p.s. love your heels, they are killer. following :)

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  3. Love your outfit!

    Satan is very scheme-y like that, trying to discourage us from doing the very thing God wants us to be doing. Love your heart! (even more than your outfit) ;)

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  4. once again another beautiful post from your HEART!! and those yellow pants...you are totally rockin em!

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  5. simply LOVE this---almost posted something exactly like this--but i was at a loss of words, You simply took the EXACT way i was feeling and put it perfectly-- LOVE the outfit BEAUTIFUL!!!

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  6. girl those are some serious shoes. I LOVE THEM!!!
    fantastic post. i have been in too many situations like this lately. so glad you figured it out. sigh. i'm gonna work on not being totally affected by these situations and just show love.
    love ya!

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  7. LOVE the striped shirt! SO cute! I TOTALLY know what you mean about one of "those" days! Read my post from yesterday! http://www.rolleduppretty.com/2011/09/pmsing-dreaming-of-10-days-from-now.html
    Ha ha. Thanks for the positive message too :) Have a great day!
    Savannah

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  8. a perfect post girl! and thanks for being my 200th follower! so perfect and was such a great way to start off my day!
    xo TJ

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  9. Well said friend!!! I struggle with when to say something and not say something...I am a little more passive with my words and there is a fine line of holding your tongue and being walked all over :) So encouraging!!!

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  10. This was such a beautiful post! Thank you for your honesty. It came at a perfect time too... I was driving home thinking the same thing and feeling all victimized for how I was treated but realized maybe I wasn't listening to God or following Him enough. As soon as I realized that I felt my heart lift and not feel so heavy.

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  11. so well put :) Thank you for sharing. I can tend to be snappy at times... esp when I'm tired or worn down... not an excuse to allow the enemy a foothold!

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  12. First off, I'd totally kill myself in those shoes!
    Satan IS afraid of you. You are rocking his world, and he is pulling out anything and everything he can think of. Sometimes, reminding us of who we are in the past is one of his dirtiest tricks. I had a friend once who was in basically the same situation. She literally looked at the woman who was chewing her out and said "Shut up, Satan, I'm sick of you." The lady shut her mouth and walked away!
    (Although I'm not sure how good of an idea it would be to do that to a stranger! lol)

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  13. I always SO ENJOY your honest and heartfelt posts! Heart Bootcamp...I love it!!! And need it!! <3

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  14. LOVE this! It's so true...God does call us to spread His love, even though it's not easy.
    And, thanks for your sweet comment on my blog and for following! I've been following you on Twitter for awhile and didn't realize I wasn't officially following your blog! Love it :) xoxo

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  15. Loving the color combo of navy and mustard. Very nice.
    And the shoes? Hot!

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  16. oooh girl, i STRUGGLE with this! i used to have quite the mouth on me... and i used to LOVE to argue. i'd tell you how it was, no problem. the Lord has done such a work in me and has shown me these few years how little i know and how much i have to learn. my words will never be as affective as His movements in their hearts. learning to take it, listen, and pray is such an exercise, but i just know that the Lord will use that picture of mercy and grace to show people himself through us.
    you're an encouragement, ashley!

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  17. I have never been more inspired by a blogger and am so happy to have found you! This post was nothing less than I could use right now. Thank you so much for sharing your story, and inspiration!

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  18. Oh, you've said so many good things in this post.. I need to re-read this another 3 times just to absorb all its goodness.. I think I've been the opposite in life.. always the nice one, wouldn't stand up for myself or what I believed in.. And after ignoring the many red flags He's thrown out me I finally got it this year.. to be a little more bold and to speak up a little louder and not be so passive. It's been a life changing experience.. while you have to remind yourself to hold your tongue, I have to remind myself to speak up a little louder if something/someone is upsetting me .. but in both cases we do it with love :) thank you <3

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  19. This is so good. I love it! I'm gonna read it again the a.m.
    Thanks for your beautiful transparency.
    Love you, gorgeous girl!

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  20. You have a beautiful way with words and sharing what's on your heart! :) I have been struggling with this as of late...and I needed the encouragement today! Thanks for reminding me how we are to love others!

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  21. Love this post...walking in love is not only shutting your mouth when you want to say something negative, but its actually replacing that negative thought/word with a positive one! ...the extra step!

    Love your shoes...too bad I'm already tall enough!

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  22. It's funny how God will keep talking to you and we don't listen half the time. I feel like most of the time when I see he is talking to me I have that do do do deja vu type feeling. I just put my hands up and go ok God I hear you, I will do it or got it!

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  23. Oh goodness. This was GOOD. I love reading what you have to say. I love being inspired by God through your words. You have a beautiful heart and a beautiful gift!!

    I'm going through some things right now, where it would be so easy to get angry, hurt or resentful. But instead Im choosing love. Because I know thats where the power is. Thats where blessing and the overcomers annointing comes. Thanks so much for sharing your heart, I needed to read this today.

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  24. great points altogether, you just gained a new reader. What would you suggest in regards to your post that you made some days ago? Any positive?

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  25. You are lovely. I am putting you in my prayers dear girl and asking God to keep using you in incredible ways! Just grabbed your new buttons to share on my blog. Love them.

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  26. outfit is very chic! love the shoes...and yes indeed God always prepares us for the task ahead! great post! and YES i believe we may be neighbors!

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  27. You are GORGEOUS inside and out :) Love your outfit! And what good perspective on this trial you're going through. It is too easy to become angry and resentful. I admire your ability to listen to God through these hard times and continuing to LOVE :)

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  28. Ashley, this is such an inspiring post. You are so on target, girl. Heart Bootcamp. I love that. Keep fighting. Hugs!

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  29. WOW, Ashley! Boy, am I so happy and blessed to stumble upon your blog! You certainly do spread God's love and word to others. I can't even express how much this post spoke out to me. I'm going to be "stalking" your old posts...can't wait to read more :)

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